“Water for Elephants”

Rated PG-13 (for moments of intense violence and sexual content)

When I saw Water for Elephants, my fellow theater occupants cheered and applauded. So it is fair to conclude that it is a real crowd-pleaser. Half of the film takes place in 1931 and, interestingly, the movie has an old fashioned feel as if it were a film from the 1930s and not 2011. It is based, as you ought to know, on a mega-best seller that has been read by umpteen-million book clubs. It is an “ahhh” movie based on an “ahhh” book. What is there to

criticize?

For a film critic, plenty, but I will get to those observations a little later. For now, here is the story (in case you are one of the half dozen folks who did not read the book). An old man named Jacob (Hal Holbrook, God bless him) wanders on the site of a modern day circus about to strike its tent and leave town. The young circus manager convinces him to come out of the rain while he calls the old man’s nursing home. They get to chat and the young one discovers that Jacob once worked for a circus — a famous circus — that had a catastrophe (in 1931). The young fellow begs to be told the “real” story — forgetting about calling the home. (We go to flash back where old Jacob becomes young Jacob played by Twilight’s Robert Pattinson.) Young Jacob was just about to take his finals at Cornell and become a veterinarian. His parents die in an accident and ends up without money or home. He hits the rails, and coincidentally, ends up on a circus train — that famous circus train. Jacob falls in love with the circus’ star attraction, a trick horse rider named Marlena (played by Reese Witherspoon), who also happens to be the wife of the rotten-to-the-core and cruel owner of the circus, August (played by that deliciously evil Nazi in “Inglourious Basterds,” Christoph Waltz). Eventually, the circus buys an elephant, which is a real money-earner, but only after August beats the bejeebies out of her…and Jacob happens upon the elephant’s — uh — key to motivation.

OK. Now I am back to being a film critic: “Water for Elephants” is a love story between Jacob and Marlena. There should be some chemistry between screen lovers but what is really between Pattinson and Witherspoon is 10 years and, forgive me, it shows; perhaps because Pattinson is such a pretty boy. Pattinson is the problem, I fear. He spends too much time looking wounded, emotionally and physically. He comes off a little too wimpy to me and sallow to be honest. Witherspoon is fine but … again … a little too maternal toward Pattinson.

Waltz is brilliant (poor guy); playing evil and cruel is going to haunt him for the rest of his career, I think. The real star of the movie is Rosie (played by Tai the elephant). And I am not joking. Animals can steal every scene, and Rosie does it every time. The actors didn’t have a chance.

I loved Hal Holbrook. With the flicker of his eye bags, the quiver of his jowls and the growl of his voice, he had my attention and I missed him while Pattinson was looking so cute that I wanted to give him a stick of gum and tell him to run along and let us adults talk. The story drags just a tad and the other characters in the story — so colorful — were somewhat underused, I think.

Please do not misunderstand me. This is worth the price of admission to be sure. It is a gratifying tale and a splendid, albeit unspectacular, film. Despite its flaws, it deserves your attention. If you want an old fashioned film without any car chases, explosions or 3D glasses, this is the ticket.

I liked it even if I was distracted by some minor, annoying missteps. It is a sweet story and is family-friendly. I suspect if you go and see it you might even cheer and applaud. It is that kind of movie. I did (albeit inaudibly).

“Water for Elephants” earns four bow ties out of five.