“The Sitter”

Rated R for crude and sexual content, pervasive language, drug material and some violence

 

OK, let’s get this straight: this is a Jonah Hill comedy. So, this is a film that is going after the crude gags. And “The Sitter” delivers a rather shocking sex joke right off. Unfortunately, the first joke falters but it establishes Mr. Hill’s character immediately. Noah is pretty much a loser — with a girl who uses him — and with life itself. He has been kicked out of college, lives with his mom, rides a boy’s pedal bike, and, is frankly, slovenly fat. (Yes, I know, he lost weight for his forthcoming film “21 Jump Street” — good for him.)

While slouching at home and watching junk TV, his mom asks him to babysit a neighbor’s kids so she can go out on a very rare date. So, Noah does it even though he doesn’t like kids and hasn’t a clue as to what is appropriate behavior with kids. As you might expect — because you have seen it many times before — the kids are no angels and are themselves not too keen on behaving appropriately. We have Slater, age 13. He can’t handle the pressure and acts neurotically. Then there is Blithe — a tiny little tot with a fixation on the talentless-celebrity lifestyle of tartish party girls. And then, there is Rodrigo, the adopted boy from El Salvador, who looks (and acts) like a South American terrorist.

Noah settles in to his job but a call comes in from the girl from the first scene who promises him sex if he brings cocaine to a party. This would require a trip from the suburbs to downtown (in New York). So, what does Noah do? He loads the kids up in the family mini van and heads off to get some cocaine and a session with the sleazy pseudo-girlfriend.

And the adventure begins … for the kids and for Noah. The problem is that the jokes are few and far between. Setting up the laughs takes too long and although the actors try, the material is scrawny.

“The Sitter” has some charm but probably only worth the price of admission if you are looking for a night with the guys swappin’ raunchy stories and sharing nachos and beer afterwards. “The Sitter” might be better caught on cable TV one night when the weather outside is frightful and the pizza place delivers. I laughed a few times here and there, but between the giggles, I grew bored and wondered how much weight Mr. Hill lost. (I saw how thin he got from the “21 Jump Street” trailer.)

Is it terrible? No. Is it good? No. Every once in a while, Jonah Hill shoots a one-liner that hits the mark, demonstrating his perfect comic timing and his unmistakable schlemiel appeal. Also, there is buried under the characters’ crudeness and latent violation of more than a few laws, an ethos of human decency. But that would take some heavy scrutiny and most likely not worth the effort.

I have written it before and I will write it again; the weeks before the holiday avalanche of blockbuster films brings us a paltry selection of meh cinema. (Educational Snippet: “Meh” is an interjection, often an expression of apathy, indifference, or boredom.) And that is how I feel about “The Sitter.” I will forget about it in a matter of days if not as soon as I finish this column. I much preferred the trailers … and wonder when Christmas will come … cinematically. I can’t wait.

“The Sitter” gets two bow ties out of five.