Do you feel that you have no control over what you feel? 

If you say yes, well then, you are wrong. One of the insights of my life is that there is a lot that can be done so that you are not “stuck” in a negative feeling. Kajai Pandey has written a quality article about this subject. He gives seven reasons on why you can manage feelings more effectively. You have more control than you thought you had.  I list them here with my added commentary. 

NO ONE CAN MAKE YOU FEEL A CERTAIN WAY UNLESS YOU GIVE THEM PERMISSION: The key here is to be aware of your thoughts, especially the negative ones that cause you to be afraid, hurt, angry, and guilty. Once you are aware of such thoughts you can change them. You do have that power. 

NO MATTER WHAT, YOU CAN CHOOSE A BETTER FEELING THOUGHT: When you have a negative feeling stuck in your brain, think of a thought that makes you feel good.

HOW YOU THINK WILL DETERMINE YOUR EXPERIENCE: I will always remember a gentleman who said to me, “John, this is how I posit the data”. What we, in fact, do too often is let negative thoughts stay in our brain to long. “Change the channel” and bring another more positive thought into your brain. A positive thought replacing the negative one changes the way you experience something.

WHAT YOU GIVE POWER TO HAS POWER OVER YOU: Again, awareness is key here. You have more power than you think you do. Don’t give away your power to a thought that is uncomfortable, unless it is something that needs to be addressed. So, address it, and move to the positive.

HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT YOURSELF DETERMINES THE RELATIONSHIP YOU HAVE WITH YOURSELF: Positive self-esteem, self-love, is important here. If you do not love yourself your being/thoughts will be permeated with negative energy. Learn to love yourself. It will be the best gift you can ever give yourself!

WHAT YOU KEEP TELLING YOURSELF DAILY WILL MANIFEST ITSELF IN YOUR LIFE EXPERIENCES: Self-talk is important. Are you overly critical of yourself? When you make a mistake, do you hang on to it and feel bad? Or are you able to say, “lesson learned,” won’t do that again.

YOU FEELINGS ARE ALWAYS AN INDICATOR OF YOUR THINKING. IF YOU CHANGE YOUR THINKING — YOU CHANGE YOUR LIFE. Again, I emphasize awareness. Know what you are feeling, don’t push them down. Once you know this, can you can start putting different thoughts into your brain. With different thoughts come different feelings!

Respected Reader, is this making sense to you? Hope so. I find this approach to be very helpful in my life and I find my clients putting this into practice as well. It works!

Dr. Stathas can be reached at 706-473-1780. Email: jstathas13@gmail.com. Web site: drstathas.googlepages.com. Blog: drstathas.com.