Disputes happen between husbands and wives. Disagreements occur in families. Businesses often have partners that no longer are on the same page. Oftentimes it is difficult to resolve issues that are upsetting in these various relationships. Options are: 1. Do nothing and continue to fight. 2. Get dueling attorneys who more often than not will escalate the anger already present and the financial cost will be substantial. 3. Mediation where the individuals present their issues in front of a Mediator who facilitates communication and resolution of such concerns. 

I have been called upon many times over the years to be the mediator when such conflict arises. I have mediated agreements for divorcing couples, estrangement between adult parents and adult kids, as well as disagreements between siblings, friends, and business partners. It is both challenging and rewarding to mediate.

When people have serious issues that they cannot resolve themselves they call on me to facilitate the process. When I first meet with the warring individuals I set some ground rules. I ask them to be respectful to each other. I ask them to not talk about the past for this usually results in tempers raised and rude behavior. I ask them to write down what the issues are and what they see to be a fair/reasonable resolution of the presenting concerns.

Usually when we begin the mediation process there is a lot of tension. I try to de-personalize the friction and emphasize that we are seeking agreement/compromise that is reasonable and fair, and that anger displays slow down, and perhaps derail, the ultimate resolution. 

Most of the time a mediation process saves both time and money. When a mediator is used resolution usually occurs faster, with much cost saving. There is one professional involved instead to two attorneys, and usually a mediator’s rate per hour is well below that of attorneys who might have been used.

Respected Reader, have there been situations when you could have used a mediator? Perhaps you are circumstances presently that warrant the use of a mediator.

A quality mediator can be a welcomed professional to help resolve issues where the individuals are at a point where they cannot do it themselves. Salvaged respect and lowered costs are reasons to utilize that mediator!