FLATWOODS, Ky. — When Ashley Keeton’s long, dark hair started to fall out in the spring of her junior year, she spent a lot of time crying.

The eastern Kentucky teen had never really known how integral her hair was to her sense of self and couldn’t have known how painful it would be to see it come out in clumps so dense they threatened to clog the bathroom drain.

Her friends, who had admired her hair and liked to touch it because it was so soft, were asking her what was wrong. She knew they were worried about her but the shock was too recent and she wasn’t ready to share.

She even started wearing hats to school, getting special permission because usually hats are forbidden under her high school’s dress code.

Keeton, now a senior, was sitting weeks ago on a bench in the student union, alternately chatting with friends and reflecting on the day ahead of her. She was also brooding about a decision she had just made — to have her head shaved rather than deal with the patchwork of remaining tresses and the painful brushing that never seemed to make it look good enough.

Her AP calculus teacher, Jeani Gollihue, sat down next to her. Ashley had already confided in Gollihue about her decision. The two discussed the scheduling of Keeton’s appointment and Gollihue spontaneously offered an act of encouragement and care — she would join Keeton and get her head shaved first in support of Keeton’s decision.

It was an unexpected but gratifying and comforting gesture to a young woman struggling with her self-image in what should be the social pinnacle of her high school career.

Keeton’s hair loss results from Hashimoto’s disease — a condition in which the immune system attacks the thyroid gland. The condition is permanent and treatable with medication, but fluctuations require changes in the medication and that exacerbates the hair loss, she says.

She has known Gollihue since her sophomore year, and found Gollihue to be a congenial and understanding mentor. In her senior year, Keeton agreed to be an aide in her classroom, helping algebra students and doing other tasks.

Teachers don’t play favorites, Gollihue said, but she remained friendly with Keeton, in part because she was among the minority of kids who actually like math.

“You have kids you click with. I’d see her in the hall and we’d say hi, and then I took her as my aide,” she said.

After Keeton confided in her about the condition and revealed she would be having her head shaved, something else in Gollihue clicked.

“What happens is we have students all the time with situations and we can’t do anything about it. We can’t fix it. As a mom and a caring adult I want to be able to fix things,” said Gollihue, who has two daughters of her own. “I could tell she was dreading it and my mama’s instinct kicked in. I wanted to fix it.”

Keeton, though now unsure of whether she wants a wig, set up an appointment for the shave job with a wig specialist in Lexington, Kentucky. On the day of the fitting both Keeton’s family — including her father Bryan who had already shaved his head — and the Gollihue family joined her.

The shaving was an anticlimactic for both Keeton and Gollihue. The stress had peaked the night before and both were ready to go in hairy and come out smooth.

But Gollihue going first eased the way, Keeton said. “It helped that she would do that. It made me think it might not be so bad.”

Keeton is coming to terms with her hair loss. She is enough of a teenager to remain self-conscious, but trusts in her faith and her character to cope. She hopes her conduct in the face of adversity will inspire others.

“Physical appearance is not everything,” she said. “My hair doesn’t define me. It’s the heart I have that defines me.”

James writes for the Ashland, Kentucky Daily Independent.